Guess what? I also have a policy. It's called respect.

Working at a call center can be ever so frustrating. Yesterday's evening hours proved this to two of my colleagues, both of them went home frustrated by people who had been rude to them.
For some reason I seem to be somewhat spared from these individuals, of course I have, once or twice, called incredibly unpleasant people, but never anyone rude enough to make me feel bad even after work.

But I seem to be blessed, because unfortunately this rudeness is fairly common, as I have commented on in a previous post.

And as much as I want to be the bigger person, sometimes this just gets to me.

To all of those people who keep telling us about their "principles" before we can even introduce ourselves ("It's a principle of mine never to participate in any survey"), I sometimes just wish that I could reply what I really want to say:
"I also have a principle that I learned at a young age. I call it respect. You might have heard of it- oh wait, probably not, since you can't even listen to someone for 30 seconds before shouting them down".

Because if it is something that you learn from talking to hundreds of people, it is that for some, respect is something that is only applicable for certain people and situations.
I actually couldn't care less about whether the person wants to participate, or finds it too bothersome to answer questions for 4 minutes. Or thinks I am the black plague personified. It is not relevant. Respect should be a basic human trait.
Regardless of who you're talking to. I think that could go a long way to create a friendlier society.
 That's all I'm saying.

The meaning of life

So this discussion arose during our microbiology class this Thursday: what is the meaning of our lives? What is the meaning of all life?
These discussions comes through every once in a while and this particular one came during the, in nerdier companies, standard dispute of "Well, what is actually a virus?"
The answer to this, insofar as I have been informed, is that a virus is an entity whose only purpose is to reproduce through host cells, which is only seen as life by some realms of science.
This then led to the discussion about other life forms (we are currently studying bacteria) where we soon decided that the purpose of mono-cellular organisms is to do all in their power to pass on their genetic material for coming generations.

There is no way that this doesn't lead up to the same question about our lives. Do we actually just exist so that our DNA can multiply?
Well in essence, however complex, amazing and advanced we see ourselves, this is what life is all about. Everything we do we do so that our DNA can reproduce. With the possible exception of drug use.  In a cold, harsh perspective, love is just a surge of different substances composed for us to feel a rush of attraction, get physical and reproduce.
Even education and work is in the end about survival, Education -> Employment -> Money -> Survival

Okay so of course this is quite a harsh and cold way of seeing the miracle of life, and the notion borders of some kind of retarded, paranoid view.
However, I found this, the meaning of life is for our DNA to replicate itself, remarkably satisfactory of a notion. Why?
 Because in essence it means that however badly I screw up, I've still on some basic level accomplished the mission of life and my existence has a meaning.

Think about it.

Mental exhaustion level: High school exam

In Sweden, and probably in other countries, admittance to universities can be done on basis of either your grades or your performance on a standardized exam, here we call it "Högskoleprovet", meaning "the high school test".
The design of this is as follows: There are 5 exam sheets, each with 40 quesions. Two of them are verbal (Swedish and English) and two are quantitative(math and numbers), and one is either one or the other, and is just a test that they will use later. For each of these sheets, you get 55 minutes, so during the exam day you write in a total of about 5 hours.

I decided that it was time that I should get into this madness and yesterday was the big day. I can't say I was very well prepared, since I mostly participated due to curiosity and to gain some experience.

This was possibly the most exhausting experience of my life so far, but it was also an intensely satisfying one. During those infinitesimally short 55 minutes of pure concentration some sort of adrenaline was surging through my body and the world around me seized to exist. These were possibly also from time to time the most frustrating moments as far as exams are concerned. Especially in the math test, since you aren't actually asked to perform any calculations, but merely to assess the example and choose one out of 4-5 given answers. The lack of possibility to perform calculations is very frustrating for me, probably because I study the kind of fields were you always want the exact answers, often down to the last decimal.
Actually, although almost all of the subjects I study are based in numbers, my numerical perception is quite low. Ask me to divide two numbers with over 3 digits and unfailingly you will loose me, at least if you ask me to do it in under a minute...
Let's state it like this. When we had written 4 parts, I was mentally off on the level where I was close to writing to a foreign friend in Swedish and almost failed to even unlock my phone, and I was then presented the last part of the exam, which was the quantitative, I came very close upon committing a mental suicide. I've never felt blacked out on that level. And you could tell by the results.

I did quite bad. I never do bad on tests.
...But apparently I do. I'm not very pleased with it, of course not, but it is quite a good experience to have undergone such pressure, and hopefully I'll to better on the next one. And if not, I have my grades. And a work at a call center. And even some friends. Life is still awesome.

Take care, And don't forget to smile :)

"I'm not interested"

The thing with calling randomly selected people to interview them during a period of 4 hours, is that you call an impressive lot of people.
And of course all of these are not very pleasant, nor respectful. The other day I listened to a very loud monologue from an elderly man, in which I was called a number of unpleasant things and condemned to a very dark future. What provoced this attack was me breathing. More specifically, me breathing down his own personal alley in the enormous grid of phone connections.
This kind of extremely immature people (if anyone reading this takes pleasure in trying to scare phonecallers, sorry to be the one to tell you this), is that it does give quite some satisfaction to be able to perserve your calm. In other words, being the bigger person.

But then there are some people that I do think are quite bothersome, that actually do ignite a little sparkle of annoyance. These are the ones that somehow think themselves too important to bother with listening to an entire sentence (about 0,75 minutes of their lives). Usually it goes like this:

-Good evening, my name is Rebecka and I'm calling you from <survey company>, we're currently conducting..."
-"Not interested"
-"...But you didn't even..."
*Hangup tone*

Now, I'm not saying that what I have to say is extremely interesting. Nor that the person down the line necessarily has got to take a huge interest in tobacco, healthcare, politics, traffic or the cleanness of their city. What I am imploring of people is to show at least enough respect to hear me say what I've got to say.
In other words, just stop being such self-important asses for a minute and recognize that human value actually does apply even if someone happens to be committing the crime of calling you.
It's politeness. Not rocket science.

Dance our tears away

Okay, so today wasn't the worst day in history. I didn't feel like shit when I came home. The weather wasn't all that horrible. I had really nice interactions with people in my school.

Even so I sort of went into a negative spiral or worrisome thoughts .
 This was due to an incident in the morning that mentally shook the ground underneath me and made me reconsider many things, to ponder on things that just don't cross my mind that often. Well, over the last year and a half I have still managed to build up enough of a steady, positive ground not to get too overwhelmed, but even so my day just didn't get very nice.
  Until a while ago.
Among the things I enjoy doing is a sort of group-dance-training. I guess it is a bit like Zumba (but in my opinion better), the main principle is: Loud, upbeat and really nice music, two really good instructors that show you the which kind of moves you should or could do, and then you just let yourself get immersed in the awesome mood.
It should go without saying, but this is an incredibly efficient way to get happier and more positive on blue days. While shifting your focus from your current trouble to how to get into the rhythm and feeling, it is so much easier to see differently on the issues at hand.

This, plus a conversation on the subject with a very understanding and good friend of mine efficiently shifted my mind-setting from blue to a vivid, sparkling array of different happy colors.
Life is not long enough to spend the whole of it worrying. Get down and get up.
And Smile :)

Not sure if...

I have a quite bipolar employment. Sometimes you're dreading going to work, sometimes it's exciting, sometimes just plain dull.
The main reason for this bipolarity is the fact that people can be incredibly unpleasant asses, and also that some people are so very pleasant.

Usually this pleasantness is just due to Swedish politeness and empathy from people who realize, that 4 hours of calling people, is not the dream job anyone always wanted.

But then there are the genuinely pleasant people, for instance the very nice mid-age father that not only took his time while the family was having dinner, but was also exceptionally nice and patient throughout the 20 minute-interview about the public transports (that he didn't even use) and after the interview even thanked me for having called him.
Whoever you were, wherever you lived. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for making my evening better.

Introduction

Hello and Welcome!
If you stumbled in accidentally, you can feel free to stay for a while.
My name is Rebecka, I'm a Swedish-Slovak girl with an affection for South America, where I've spent a year of my life (Paraguay) although I most of all wish I was Brazilian.
The reason I created this blog is, as I stated a week-or-so, that I think quite a lot, and I like to share my less confused or irrational thought with humanity. This has led to an immense overflow of my Facebook-friends newsfeeds, which has also been pointed out to me.
I thus figured that it could be a relief to said individuals to not have to always take part of my thinking processes,
furthermore, I do really enjoy writing and creating, so some art will also appear every once in a while.
And I swear, I do have some good thoughts and observations, especially on people.

Concerning the naming of the blog, it is closely related to a) why I think so much, which intrinsically leads us to b) Why peoples newsfeeds are being flooded by my posts.
I have gotten employed at a call center. My employer is Ipsos Observer, a survey company that interviews people on everything from public transports through alcohol and all the way to politics and bank services.
My mission is to bother and incredible lot of people on a very inconvenient hour and try to make them answer questions. This is also all, there's no advertisement or selling involved. A teacher of mine explained to me a while back that he thought it was "A respectable and important job". Now, I am not sure if I can agree with the sooner, but I do think the latter makes sense.
Not to sound to brainwashed, but these interviews do serve a purpose: To make our society better. In some cases.
But the thing is that a normal evening at work, a total of 4 hours, normally consists of 1-1,5 hours of talking to people, either to coax them into participating or interviewing, and 2,5-3 hours of plain waiting.
This waiting time is a very good time to ponder on more or less important matters.
And I want to share some of those thoughts here. I hope you'll find it interesting.